Sunday, March 7, 2010

I Miss Him


I miss my husband.....that's it. I have another six months until he comes home and there are days when I don't know if I will make it that long. It's so hard being without your other half when the only thing you want is for them to be near.
Throughout 2009, just about every Army unit in our area deployed to Iraq. My husband's unit was one of the last to leave. But now, all of these units are returning....returning to their families, their jobs, their real world. And can I say, I'm a bit jealous. But then I feel bad because I'm jealous. It's ridiculous! These wives have put in their time and paid their dues. They have played single mother to their kids and have dealt with the heartache of distance. But still, I can't help but be upset that my husband is not home also.
This week, I was able to be a part of a homecoming celebration for a very dear friend. Her husband spent a year in Baghdad, working in one of Saddam Hussein's palaces. During their year apart, she gave birth to their first child.....an event that her husband could not be a part of. She raised their son for the first nine months without the help of dad on top of the daily worry that her husband wouldn't make it home to even meet his son. I was thrilled for her that he was on his way home but at the same time, I was angry. Why does her husband get to come home but mine has to stay behind?? Why does she get her husband back now and I have to wait another six months??
I have so much time and will have to continue to watch more wives get their husbands back. I'm very thankful these troops are coming home because there are so many wives that have unfortunately lost theirs. I have to remember that one day, it will be my turn and I will be in his arms again. Until that day comes, I will continue to welcome home our troops and supporting my husband from afar.

Sunday, February 28, 2010

HOLY COW!!

It's been close to a year since my last blog update. SOOOO much has happened in the past year and I'm having a hard time deciding where to even begin...
The biggest thing that has happened this year is that my husband has been deployed to Iraq. It's been the hardest thing that I have ever had to deal with and at times I wonder if I'm strong enough to handle all that deployment brings. I support my husband in all he does and I couldn't be more proud of him. But there are days when I doubt myself and my abilities to get through the year. His orders to Iraq are for 12 months and thank heavens, we are almost halfway complete!!
I have learned so much about myself and who I am while my he's been away. We decided before he deployed that I would stick it out at home and not move to Colorado with his family. I never really had to do anything on my own so making the decision to stay was very hard. But being on my own, if I want or need something done, I have to do it or it won't get done. I have to rely on myself for certain things. That was a big step for me and I realized that I'm stronger than I once thought.
I miss my husband every single second of every single day and can't wait until he comes home. But until then, I will continue to raise our children and count down the days until he comes home for good. I plan to continue blogging and keeping everyone up to date on this deployment. Pray I can keep my sanity!!